Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Middle Aged

I had a birthday about a month ago, back on February 19th.
 TURNED 35!!! 
I must admit that this one was a bit hard for me.  Inside I still feel like the same 18 year old that just graduated from high school, although I've grown a lot and feel more confident in what I know I can do and accomplish.  I'm more independent.  
But outside - it's beginning to show.  Although I still get the occasional - "I thought you were a teenager when I saw you walk into the school" from other mothers - I think that has more to do with my height.  If you see me close up it's a little more obvious.  The white hair around my cowlick that started growing in about 5  years ago, the fine lines around my eyes and mouth, the sagging eyelids and skin around my jaw, the spongy belly and rounded hips.  How can this be?  I don't feel old!!!! 
I still feel like the same 23 year old that cuddled her first baby and wondered what in the world to do.  Now if I had a baby - I'd be a candidate for genetic counseling since birth defects raise dramatically at the age of 35.  Did this really happen?  How did I get here?  I was called to be Primary President last summer - Seriously?  I'm not old enough to be President of anything - or so I thought.
Daniel took these pictures of me on my birthday.  One day I'm going to look back and say - Look how young I look (at age 35)!  Here are some of my emotions on the subject.

ANGER!!  I DON'T WANT TO GET OLD!!
SURPRISE - HOW AND WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN?
JOY -I wouldn't give any of the time back! 
CONTENT - I wouldn't change a thing (OK maybe the spongy belly and rounded hips)

11 comments:

Judi said...

Oh, I so understand your thoughts and feelings about age. Just last week as I was driving home from a doctor's visit it just really hit me that I am no longer in my 20's! Yet at the same time I still have a 2 year old and my oldest is only 9! And that life is getting a little more serious. I have to have mammograms now - that makes me feel like I am old.

I don't color my hair or highlight it yet though - I figure it is only a matter of time when I will HAVE too :).

You look great Brittney and by the way Happy Birthday!

Jim and Reenie said...

Yes, I know about sagging bellies, I think you were hugely responsible for mine weighing in at 9 lbs 5 oz. However, you are right about looking back in a few years and saying, "Wow, look how young I look". Time stands still for no man. But you look just georgous to this Mom. I'm so proud of you Britt.
Love, Mom
And hey, that little poser with you did a great job with her faces too.

Anonymous said...

Great photos. i think that you look beautiful... you always have and always will. you will always look 5 years younger than you actually are. I think that you are looking more and more like mom.. and since we happen to have a riduculously beautiful mom - that's a good thing :o) I love you! ( Don't hate me because I am still 10 years younger than you and always will be :o) I used to be sooooo jealous that you were 10 years older and could do sooo much more than me.. now that we can basically do all the same things.. i don't mind being 10 years younger.

Boss said...

I'm not far behind you, but I'm not aging nearly as gracefully as you are. I'll see your sagging eyelids (even though I don't) and raise you four stubbly chin hairs!

You are grace and beauty personified. Happy birthday!

O family said...

OH Britt- I think that you are absolutely beautiful. I don't see any lines or wrinkles. I do think that you are right that when you look back, you will think "man, I looked good then". When I see my little wrinkles around my eyes, I just tell myself that they are smile lines. I can't help it if I smile too much and therefore have creases!

O family said...

ALSO- Piper is so stinking cute in these pictures!! Love them!

Princess Gerty said...

I understand how you feel, even though I am just a couple of years behind you. I just am excited that I am looking more my age, and people won't think I am even close to a teen mother.

Jim and Reenie said...

Brit,
You look great. By the way your blog hurts bigtime! If you are 35, I must be 58. Whoa, I am...where did those 35 years go?? The crazy part is that the older you get the faster the years go by. Youth is definetely wasted on the young. Not quite fair but it beats the alternative,eh?
Love you,
Dad
Cute girl sittin' with ya!

B said...

I am soo right there with you Lady! My 35 day is tomorrow, and I can't believe how quickly we've come to AMA (Advanced maternal age!)

You are gorgeous, and I see no sign of white hair on your head...I see mine every day though...sigh.

Hope your day was happy!

emlizalmo said...

Britt...you look like you are 15, especially when you smile! I have been postponing commenting on this blog because your birthday came and went without a package or a phonecall from me and I'm embarrassed. I hope it was wonderful. I hope you know that I love you. I have SO many happy, happy memories of the 2 of us together. :)

jennis said...

Happy belated birthday, Britt-- I think you still look great (and young too)!! I love Piper's expression looking at your "angry face"!